FAQ’s

Mediation is a positional bargaining event where both sides tend to start high or low in terms of offers and jockey towards some middle ground, sometimes not disclosing to the other side information that would be integral to the settlement process. Often, clients are in separate rooms and, even if meeting together, have minimal opportunity to hear and understand the wants and needs of the other side or the true direction being taken by the attorney for the other client.

Going straight to mediation may shoehorn a final decision. If mediation is unsuccessful, the next step is preparing for trial which can create undue pressure to reach a settlement. Clients are often left wondering what they left on the table or did not know. Sometimes mediation also reinforces a power imbalance between the couple.

In contrast, one of the cornerstones of the Collaborative Process is interest-based negotiation. In this settlement model, the team, consisting of you and your spouse, your respective attorneys, and the neutrals, learns each person’s interests and goals, and then works together to fashion a durable resolution. Decisions are made by you and your spouse, after agreed financial disclosure, bolstered by being advised by the team of options and alternative solutions. The overarching goal of the Collaborative Process is to guide the couple toward creating a sustainable, new family unit.

Absolutely. Your attorneys will confer and file with the court a Notice of Intent to Proceed Collaboratively and the case will be taken out of the normal litigation track. Court deadlines and trial requirements will be suspended so the divorce can proceed through the Collaborative Process to conclusion.

Cases are not one size fits all. The Collaborative Process considers the needs and wants of the couple, meaning you control the pace and timing depending on your family’s circumstances. Collaborative Divorces where both sides timely disclose their financial information and participate, if relevant, in working towards a Parenting Plan, often can resolve in four to six months. Collaborative Divorces requiring complex financial calculations, such as business valuations or property appraisals, may take additional time, but tend to resolve much sooner than litigated cases.

The collaborative meetings set a foundation for healthy coparenting by modeling how to build options and discuss outcomes cooperatively even when the issues are sensitive for the family. This practice then translates into parents who respect the role of the other parent, allow for differences in parenting, and see the value of both parents in the lives of the children.

The collaborative process is designed for all kinds of divorcing families, including those experiencing acrimony and hostility. The collaborative team works early to identify and address communication or emotional issues that may get in the way of successful negotiations in the collaborative process. The “one-size-fits-all” traditional divorce encourages polarization through court filings, which inflames matters.

The collaborative team includes a mental health professional whose expertise is addressing emotional issues and dysfunctional communication. The team seeks to reduce tension between the spouses while acknowledging and tackling the difficulties inherent in the divorce process.

You and your spouse will each need to hire a collaborative attorney who will represent you in a collaborative divorce. You can find a list of collaborative attorneys in the directory here. If needed, the first attorney retained on a collaborative divorce may provide a list of suggested names of collaborative attorneys for the other spouse to consider.

Once both collaborative attorneys are retained, they agree upon a mental health neutral and financial neutral to join the team based on the unique issues your family faces. At that point, the clients, attorneys, and neutrals sign a Collaborative Participation Agreement and a Collaborative Communications Agreement to formally begin the collaborative divorce process.

The collaborative team determines your family’s financial picture, including assets, liabilities, and income, using a business-like “trust but verify” approach. Clients commit in the Collaborative Participation Agreement to disclose information voluntarily and to verify it with documentation, such as tax returns or bank and investment account statements.

The collaborative process is designed to guard against dishonesty. If there are questions about whether information being provided is accurate, collaborative attorneys can request source documents from an employer or banking institution. Most couples realize it is in their best interests to remain honest and allow the process to work.
Traditional legal “discovery” procedures significantly increase cost and time. Information gathering in the collaborative process is more streamlined and reduces the duplication of work.